GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS...
Granny Barkes
Granny Barkes Fell In Woolworths was to have been published soon after Easter. It hasn't and many are asking why so?
It's all the fault of Detterling. How come? I hear you all ask. Come back with me to 2015. Detterling announced that his memoirs would be published in April 2015. April 2015 came and no memoirs. He then posted that his memoirs would be published in April 2016. April 2016 came and no memoirs. April 2017 came and no memoirs published. April 2018 came and no memoirs published. April 2019 came and no memoirs published. April 2020 came and no memoirs published. April 2021 came and no memoirs published. April 2022 came and no memoirs published.
April 2023 came, and you guessed it - and no memoirs published. I held back Granny Barkes in case it clashed with an April 2023 publication of his memoirs. I now of course have accepted that no memoirs by Detterling will ever be published.
I am currently arranging with my publishers for a new date for the publication of Granny Barkes Fell In Woolworths. 25th September 2023 seems a possibility.
Will keep you all posted.
GENE
PS
I forgot to mention that I shall be personally signing the first 10.000 copies. And this will be in my real hand-written signature. No use of that autopen that got Bob Dylan into such trouble.
Even judged as bollocks this is bollocks. My memoirs will be published posthumously, as I have said dozens of times
ReplyDeleteWhen are you going to admit that “Granny Barkes Fell in Woolworths” doesn’t exist and never will.
If anyone wants to know what desperate and pathetic excuses look like, all they have to do is read the nonsensical reasons for the delayed publication of Granny Barkes stretching back over FOUR YEARS. What a pitiful display, Gene
"My memoirs will be published posthumously, as I have said dozens of times."
ReplyDeleteNo, you have not said this before. Published posthumously! It's the way you tell 'em.
YOUR MEMOIRS WILL NEVER BE PUBLISHED FOR THE SIMPLE REASON THAT THEY HAVE NOT BEEN WRITTEN - AND NEVER WILL BE WRITTEN.
GENE
No, Gene. You are wrong. My memoirs are listed to be published within six months of my death. I completed the rewrite in October 2020 and they were accepted by a north eastern publisher in January 2021. No amount of your shouted gainsaying will alter that.
ReplyDeleteGranny Barkes Fell in Woolworths remains the 2000-word word salad you began in 2011 and added to at the rate of seventy five words a year. It also remains a meaningless sub-sub James Joyce imitation, Finnegans Wake fifteen times watered. No publisher in his right senses would spend money to ruin his literary reputation by putting it into print. At any rate, now that you have given us a new date I can have more fun at your expense in the next few months. What a stupid, sad man you are. You can’t even concoct a convincing lie, never mind write a novel.
I forgot to mention that I shall be personally signing the first 10.000 copies. And this will be in my real hand-written signature. No use of that autopen that got Bob Dylan into such trouble.
ReplyDeleteGENE
"I forgot to mention that I shall be personally signing the first 10.000 copies. And this will be in my real hand-written signature. No use of that autopen that got Bob Dylan into such trouble."
ReplyDeleteGene, this is far, far beyond a joke. This is serious psychosis.
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS – THE WHOLE SORRY, PATHETIC SAGA.
ReplyDeleteAfter claiming in late 2019 that this dismal sub-James Joyce crap, Finnegans Wake twenty times watered and only 1, 972 words long, had been accepted for publication by a “Californian publisher” [in a post which has, mysteriously, since been taken down], Gene has offered a series of excuses for its continued non-appearance ranging from nonsensical to profoundly nonsensical.
The whole of the 2020 blog has also disappeared, largely because its progress during that year amounted to a series of total humiliations for Gene after he fell for a sequence of outrageous hoaxes wrought upon him by Detterling. During 2020, however, Gene was able to capitalise on the pandemic to account for the continued non-appearance of his non-existent novel. It is typical of Gene by the way that he used a national and international tragedy to stop him from looking like the liar and fraud that he is – utterly and callously selfish. “Millions of people dead in a pandemic? Never mind that, it’s the perfect excuse I need to avoid being caught out in a lie.” Utter filth.
Nonetheless, Gene posted this on February 12th, 2021:
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS TO BE PUBLISHED IN APRIL 2021
April came and went, and no publication emerged, and if Gene published an excuse he has since taken it down. However that might be, the next three months were taken up with one of Gene’s most degrading humiliations [which led to a performance on his part of outstanding grubbiness, seediness and stupidity. This was when Detterling hoaxed him into believing that he, Detterling, had died. Wonderful stuff and vintage Detterling.
Next, we got this on Sunday, 31 October 2021
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS TO BE PUBLISHED ON FEBRUARY 1st 2022 – Official
Anyway, the next we heard was this ludicrously feeble excuse:
Sunday, 23 January 2022
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS ... sorry folks, another delay: Granny Barkes Fell in Woolworths was scheduled to be published on 1st February 2022. This will now be delayed over copyright complications with regard to Johnny Bluenote's paintings which are to be used in the book. Johnny Bluenote is a long-term friend of Gene. He is an exceptionally talented painter and photographer. The American abstract artist, Franz Kline, has been a big influence on Johnny Bluenote's work.
[
Nb that Johnny Bluenote doesn’t exist any more than his paintings do. He was one of Gene’s sockpuppets back on TES Opinion and the only painting Gene has ever done was to creosote his garden shed]. Never mind: stagger forward to
Friday, 3 June 2022
Sorry folks: another slight delay with the publication of 'GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS'
Sorry folks, another slight delay with the publication of GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS. It looks now like publication will be in October/November 2022.
At least we were spared some ridiculous excuse on this occasion. On the other hand, Gene did try to keep the pot warm with this “teaser”:
Friday, 26 August 2022
The fish in the pond are seeing red...
The fish in the pond are seeing red
As Bobby is fishing with Coates strong thread
(From the soon to be Published GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS.)
Which brings us more or less up to date with this, even if it does revive the Johnny Bluenote nonsense.
Wednesday, 25 January 2023
GRANNY BARKES UPDATE...
Well folks it looks like Granny Barkes Fell in Woolworths WILL HIT THE BOOKSHELVES AT LONG LAST IN MARCH 2023.
There has been a slight delay because of the copyright of the illustrations to be used. Granny Barkes Fell in Woolworths will be illustrated with a number of specially commissioned original paintings by Johnny Bluenote.
And of course it makes no reference to the purported avoidance of a clash with the publication of Detterling’s memoirs, given that Gene only thought it up on Monday.
Game, set and match, yet again, to Detterling.