THE THREE MOST POPULAR THREADS EVER POSTED ON 'GENE: a voice in the wilderness'
NUMBER ONE
Wednesday, 9 February 2022
I have not heard anything of Annie for years. My feeling is that she has passed to the Lord. I doubt if she could ever have recovered from the terrible sufferings inflicted by the Clique.
LEST WE FORGET
NUMBER TWO
Monday, 6 May 2013
Traveling Wilburys – The Del Shannon Sessions
UPDATED VERSION OF THIS ARTICLE
Traveling Wilburys – The Del Shannon Sessions
Traveling Wilburys – The Del Shannon Sessions
Tracklist Hide Credits▼
| A | Del Shannon – | Walk AwayAcoustic Guitar, Backing Vocals – Tom Petty Acoustic Guitar, Electric Guitar, Bass, Keyboards – Jeff Lynne Drums, Percussion – Phil Jones (3) Electric Guitar – Mike Campbell Performer [Slapping Thighs] – Del Shannon, Jeff Lynne, Tom Petty Vocals, Acoustic Guitar, Electric Guitar – Del Shannon | 3:37 | |
| B | Del Shannon – | Let's DanceAcoustic Guitar – Mike Campbell Acoustic Guitar, Electric Guitar, Bass – Jeff Lynne Drums – Phil Jones (3) Fiddle – Richard Greene Piano, Accordion – Benmont Tench Vocals, Acoustic Guitar, Electric Guitar – Del Shannon | 3:31 |
Notes▼
NUMBER THREE
Monday, 8 March 2021
GREAT MOMENTS IN HISTORY
(Selected by Gene)
Bob Dylan's single, Like a Rolling Stone enters the Billboard top forty at N0 2
It's a balmy afternoon in New York City in June 1965. The sky is a cloudless blue but a slight breeze keeps the temperature bearable.
Bob Dylan is strolling through Greenwich Village. The pop/country singer, Johnny Tillotson, who has had several big hits in the early Sixties, walks over to Bob. Bob in his Cuban-heeled boots is 5' 7". Johnny Tillotson is about an inch shorter. Johnny says to Bob, "Hey man, your record Like a Rolling Stone is at number two on Billboard." Bob's reply has not been recorded.
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS – THE WHOLE PATHETIC SAGA.
ReplyDeleteAfter claiming in late 2019 that this dismal sub-James Joyce crap, Finnegans Wake twenty times watered and only 1, 972 words long, had been accepted for publication by a “Californian publisher” [in a post which has, mysteriously, since been taken down], Gene has offered a series of excuses for its continued non-appearance ranging from nonsensical to profoundly nonsensical.
The whole of the 2020 blog has also disappeared, largely because its progress during that year amounted to a series of total humiliations for Gene after he fell for a sequence of outrageous hoaxes wrought upon him by Detterling. During 2020, however, Gene was able to capitalise on the pandemic to account for the continued non-appearance of his non-existent novel. It is typical of Gene that he used a national and international tragedy to stop him from looking like the liar and fraud that he is – utterly, callously selfish. “Millions of people dead in a pandemic? Never mind that - it’s the perfect excuse I need to avoid being caught out in a lie.” Utter filth.
Nonetheless, Gene posted this on February 12th, 2021:
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS TO BE PUBLISHED IN APRIL 2021
April 2021 came and went, and no publication emerged. If Gene published an excuse he has since taken it down. However that might be, the next three months were taken up with one of Gene’s most degrading humiliations [leading to a performance on his part of outstanding grubbiness, seediness and idiocy. This was when Detterling hoaxed him into believing that he, Detterling, had died. Wonderful stuff and vintage Detterling. Next, we got this on Sunday, 31 October 2021:
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS TO BE PUBLISHED ON FEBRUARY 1st 2022 – Official
The next we heard was this ludicrously feeble excuse:
Sunday, 23 January 2022
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS ... "sorry folks, another delay: Granny Barkes Fell in Woolworths was scheduled to be published on 1st February 2022. This will now be delayed over copyright complications with regard to Johnny Bluenote's paintings which are to be used in the book. Johnny Bluenote is a long-term friend of Gene. He is an exceptionally talented painter and photographer. The American abstract artist, Franz Kline, has been a big influence on Johnny Bluenote's work."
[Johnny Bluenote doesn’t exist any more than his paintings do. The name was one of Gene’s sockpuppets back on TES Opinion and the only painting Gene has ever done was to creosote his garden shed].
Never mind: stagger forward to Friday, 3 June 2022:
"Sorry folks, another slight delay with the publication of GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS. It looks now like publication will be in October/November 2022. At least we were spared some ridiculous excuse on this occasion. On the other hand, Gene did try to keep the pot warm with this “teaser”:
Friday, 26 August 2022
The fish in the pond are seeing red
As Bobby is fishing with Coates strong thread
(From the soon to be Published GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS.)
Which brings us more or less up to date with this, even if it does revive the Johnny Bluenote nonsense.
Wednesday, 25 January 2023
GRANNY BARKES UPDATE...
"Well folks it looks like Granny Barkes Fell in Woolworths WILL HIT THE BOOKSHELVES AT LONG LAST IN MARCH 2023. There has been a slight delay because of the copyright of the illustrations to be used. Granny Barkes Fell in Woolworths will be illustrated with a number of specially commissioned original paintings by Johnny Bluenote."
And of course it makes no reference to the purported avoidance of a clash with the publication of Detterling’s memoirs, given that Gene only thought it up on Monday. Game, set and match, yet again, to Detterling, and another embarrassingly feeble performance by Gene. And you have to wince at the level of barminess evinced by Gene's promise to autograph the first 10,000 copies. That is serious psychosis, the poor sod.
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS PART IV:
ReplyDelete... No-one will read your papers... Oh! Hugh is staunch... Jack's in Diviney... Smithers... Stick to your job... You're only making a faddle (fardel) of yourself... Here's Dalzell; "I'm going up the stairs now."... I could be in Kensington tomorrow... There's a car... The image of a girl... Deeper than the wishing well... Ballina, Balnabroka, Anahinahola, don't show the white feather wherever you go... Carolina moon... What a beautiful day! What must heaven be like?... Do you know our d'Brian?... There they are... Who got hit?... You're nice Miss Rice.... I see said the blind man... Better class walnut Mollie...The fish in the pond are seeing red as Bobby is fishing with Coates strong thread... And all round Peter Brewer's car... Foldorol… Silent Ginnio; holy Ned... And those who come from distance far are always late for tea... Oh! to be in Doonaree... All day all night Marianne; down by the seaside sifting sand... Look at the way he's twisting that stick... Now it's tied; now it's tied; and now it's Tide... He went from the livery stable... There's a cock's stride on the dunghill... All silver no brass. Bad money won't pass... Samson Burke, Sammy Berg: Who's kidding who?...He won't know himself in this lovely place... You've given me a taste of fame... I predict she'll soon be back with Desi Arnaz Jr who phones her nightly from California... There was a wild colonial boy Jack Saltey was his name. Gory night in Yonkers... Geoff Duke. Teach these kids how to play ball... Ballydainty… Brockman here... Elenore Gee! I think you're swell... A train-band captain eke was he from Ballylucas town... The people they call me Calypso Joe. Peas ... er, from our garden. Delish... Oh! my diploma... I win a pound... The ancient ring post snapped like a matchstick... I think, I think, that she's the mostest of the lot, and furthermore she is the only chick I got... Nicolette, I can pick 'em!... Raddle diddle da ha ha... A great time of day to be in such good humour... They all wore black coats and black top hats and they turned and went up to your room... Deep, deep river, away, away... Early morning light, Rat ta-tat ta-tat ta-tat. Rat ta-tat ta-tat ta-tat..
Does it make more sense when published backwards? Let me answer that question. Does it buggery!!
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS PART III:
ReplyDeleteWe sell only the best E..E..English C..C..Coca Cola... Aye but, naw but, could you cut turf?... Hollyhocks! Hollyhocks! over Bobby Lyttle's garden wall... It's well known that he has an atomic soul, and when it soars it does aesthetically so... Well, there's the name on the letter... Curran; Curran naturely… I don't know where I left it; I must have left it in my diary... Sugden's regret was that he had wasted police time... "You took the coat hanger to it."... The seas obey, the fetters break and lifeless limbs thou dost restore... You could easily stand on Kelly's hills and count his skinny ribs... Barefooted thatcher, Pa Bunty... Have you got a wagon to put these wheels on?... Leave your briefs with us... Lauda Jerusalem Dominum, Lauda Deum tuum Sion... Man attacked and thoroughly beaten; attackers make off in a posh car... Swiftly, silently and unseen... It's a knock on! It's a knock on!... You see Missus D; there's the cow and there's the gate... "C'mon... let's get home for the beef and spuds."... Ecce Panis Angelorum… Can it be I can't see the curtain?... Dee daw Marjorie Raw... You're idle for stelk... Saucepan gossiper... Corduroy for every boy, cordurat for every cat... We're the boys that fears no noise, we are the bold Drumarda boys... On Saturday night we all got tight and Cassidy brought us over... Silver Saturday, jink night... Listening to the footsteps of the boys from Tedd... Dick Nan's: just the spot for a picnic... Are we seeing daylight?... That last brattle was terrible... Listen to me George: "Would you like white stones on your grave?"... Fish away... Going to the hop? Should be good... At least when it rains in Torquay it is still warm... You know I have an affection for thee... Miss Minihan may laugh; but Miss Minihan is a barbarian... I've got an interview with the COM. Social Committee... When life stretched out before him he refused to look that way... The bespectacled roadman... Have you ever been to Bellevue Kitty?... Chick a boom, chick a rack; chick a boom, chick a rack, and the yellow skirt goes swinging... Pete the birdman will now fly... I've had a pie... And the hunter home from the hills... What age are you now?... Mr. Marley has been dead these seven years, Scrooge replied. It's fair now Auntie... He died seven years ago, this very night... Too strong Grandad, too strong... Go on Balfour!... Santa Agatha, ora pro nobis... "Pope Pius XII died during the night."... The Ypres Salient at Night... Histracy... Wherefore have you left your sheep on that stony mountain steep?... Eee ba gum lad, some good motorbikes oop north... Hi for a toffer and hi for it still; and hi for the wee lad lies over the hill... The river eddy whirls... Beati Michaeli archangelo... Put a table in the hall and it will do fine... And he fully did... Jimmy Hicks is not in hell... Rushe came down last night... Tis but a Dolly Mixture... I know my nick name... Uncle Merry... For aye for guide: very good neighbours, but keep your back to us... Apostrophe at the Post Office today... Let the reindeers go. Let them go!... For God's sake Master, you couldn't do them sums... Good morrow Mick...
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS PART II:
ReplyDeleteWhat's ahead for Tom McNeely?... Which one's thaaat?... Night's for rest, night's for rest... There's a yellow rose in Texas... "Hot diggity, dog ziggity, boom, what you do to me, when you're holding me tight."... A field in Larne... Would it be physical?... A stew boiled is a stew spoiled... The Minster-clock has just struck two, and yonder is the Moon... Boys obtuse... And the hunter home from the hills... My hand is in my hussyfskap… Wait 'til I get another stone for you Cyril... McAree, McAra, McAvarn K-Kunny, put in your white foot 'til I see if you're my mummy... What signals regression in an individual?... Bara lynsey, bara lynsey... Hanif? Barrington? What's the difference baby doll?... Patch upon patch sown without stitches; come riddle me this and I'll give you my britches... Are you ruptured?... I'm just warning ye... "Hold on, my door was hit too."... Joe Worthington, Joe Worthington you'd sit till you'd rot... Come to the water fit a thank ye, fit a thank ye, fit a thank ye... Dazed I stepped forward to be congratulated by Lord Erne... Most postmen are dishonest and do steal money from envelopes... Sam McVey... I washed my hands in water; water never run, and I dried them in a towel that was neither wove nor spun... And red breeches... Here comes I Wee Devil Doubt, the pain within, the pain without... Peeping round the door in the khaki there to see the old pair once again... UVD?... Hey! you guys you gotta wear ties... When I was a lad so was me Dad... Ta Ra Ra Bam, Ta Ra Ra Ching, Ta Ra Ra Bam, Ta Ra Ra... 'Twas on a Sunday evening that Barlow's it was robbed: Mrs Barlow went down to the room to get a treacle scone, but when she saw the moneybox, the money it was gone... Genitori, Genitoque Laus et jubilation... Dowsey wee Tawbey... We'll get away again... He relies too much on his effing muscles... The Protestant boys are loyal and true: they are in me eye says Donal Abu... What's the 'with thee' for? What's the 'with thee' for?... Sonny outlook... On a brick-coloured ticket, that's brick Pat... All in!... Water! Water!, er , Tea! Tea!, with two lumps of sugar and a spot of milk... You're aye putting it off... I wonder, yes I wonder, will the angels way up yonder, will the angels play their harps for me?... Whistle and I will come to you me lad... Get that Teddy Boy haircut out of my sight!... The one with the black bucket is the best... Paw! Haw! Haw! John's just laughing at us... The shadow of the Valois is yawning at the Mass... Sandy Row on an Easter Monday, every day's like an Easter Sunday... It's always Torchie and the second years... Willie Ruckie... Milled today, fed tomorrow... It's long and it's narrow, it's not very wide, it wears a green selvage on every side... Let us finance you project... Tilly Versailles... "Yes, yogurt is very good for longlevity"... Yes and truly you are best... No more tomorrows in your career... Naw Ivy, he's nae comin doon… Dr Whitehead... Piss, Piss Iceland dog!... First game for Richmond and not turning up? I was offhand with the woman... You were a greasy little leather boy in 1956... Tickets are sixpence each and I hope you all win... Andera Keck K-Keck K-Keck K-Keck...
GRANNY BARKES FELL IN WOOLWORTHS - PART ONE.
ReplyDeleteGranny Barkes fell in Woolworths ... she'll get a free ride in the ambulance Ha! Ha! Ha!... The just man falls seven times... Look! See the tracks of Santa's feet on the hearth... I'll break your ould desk... Say what may the tidings be, on this glorious Christmas morn?... He's lost his apple cake... Look! Look what Mairead has made!... That would bury Dick and Diamond... Indeed he went all the way to the whiney nough... I'm getting a wheelbarrow tomorrow: it's brand new ... I can't sleep with excitement... This is a day above all days... No, we are off to school, c'mon Eddie... I heard a roar between two hills... L to the water Jimmy Harte... I wish that day would come back again... And flying my kite... What happened to your lorry Jim?... Owner not liable for accidents... Lay on MacDuff... Archibald A. Funk... Edward's day out... He cut down a tree from the hedge of the car road with a hatchet - yes, but it's his birthday... I don't know; maybe so... Zat no terrible... I think they did... Look at the size of the flakes! Look at the size of the flakes!... There's a stepmother's breath in the air... He stole matches... Stone taw! Stone taw!... Oh! I love to play when the decorations are up... If I was you I'd build a wall... I would pull the gun on any man... He's a good maker... The Irvines of the wheel, the wild men from Borneo... Time waits for no man, not even John Roy... Jeremiah, blow the fire; puff, puff, puff... Your man has killed Tinker Weir. He'll be hung. You poor woman... Blue ink, black ink, and good red ink... See that sycamore tree? By the end of November there won't be a single leaf left on it... Secundam scripturas... Has he no ears?... Some cherry-cheeked apples he saw on his way... Hey! Don't touch that coal scuttle, that belongs to Stanton Bailey... That's the biggest laugh I've had since I put salt in the sugar bowl last week... I'll get ye Tony... James Hugh Monaghan from Dernee, a warrior I do beliee... Hurling by bum, hurling by bum... Ya'll come now? Oh! that do make it nice... Belledotie, Belledotie… I'd give you a guarantee... Grroah! Murphy!... You are very unsatisfactory... I was reading The Messenger... Yes, and truly, you are best... Drinking buttermilk all the week, whiskey on a Sunday... Back to back, belly to belly, don't give a damn about Yarnarelli... Come day, go day, God send Sunday... The chocolate tree, the sweet tree... The waters wild went o'er his child and he was left lamenting... 'Ma mither is a queen', said he... It was dull, deadly dull, at Solitude... This new wheel of fortune has just come from France... John Johnston's horses are in your corn...
Reply
This is absolutely fascinating! I shall certainly be buying the book when it is published.
ReplyDeleteBob 'Sword edge' Wilkinson
You will have a very very long wait. Gene started writing this literary sewage in 2011, and above is the “novel” in its entirety. Simply print it for nothing - you will then have your money’s worth anyway.
Delete