Tuesday, 6 January 2026

 The Feast of the Epiphany would not be complete without TS Eliot's 'The Journey of the Magi'...




Image result for The Journey Of The Magi
THE JOURNEY OF THE MAGI   ...   James Tissot


The Journey Of The Magi

A cold coming we had of it,
Just the worst time of the year
For a journey, and such a long journey:
The ways deep and the weather sharp,
The very dead of winter.'
And the camels galled, sorefooted, refractory,
Lying down in the melting snow.
There were times we regretted
The summer palaces on slopes, the terraces,
And the silken girls bringing sherbet.
Then the camel men cursing and grumbling
and running away, and wanting their liquor and women,
And the night-fires going out, and the lack of shelters,
And the cities hostile and the towns unfriendly
And the villages dirty and charging high prices:
A hard time we had of it.
At the end we preferred to travel all night,
Sleeping in snatches,
With the voices singing in our ears, saying
That this was all folly.

Then at dawn we came down to a temperate valley,
Wet, below the snow line, smelling of vegetation;
With a running stream and a water-mill beating the darkness,
And three trees on the low sky,
And an old white horse galloped away in the meadow.
Then we came to a tavern with vine-leaves over the lintel,
Six hands at an open door dicing for pieces of silver,
And feet kicking the empty wine-skins.
But there was no information, and so we continued
And arriving at evening, not a moment too soon
Finding the place; it was (you might say) satisfactory.

All this was a long time ago, I remember,
And I would do it again, but set down
This set down
This: were we led all that way for
Birth or Death? There was a Birth, certainly
We had evidence and no doubt. I had seen birth and death,
But had thought they were different; this Birth was
Hard and bitter agony for us, like Death, our death.
We returned to our places, these Kingdoms,
But no longer at ease here, in the old dispensation,
With an alien people clutching their gods.
I should be glad of another death.

Friday, 2 January 2026

 

The key to Midsomer Murders' enduring appeal

The cast of Midsomer Murders (Getty)

If dramas like Adolescence are the rough televisual equivalent of whoever won the latest Turner Prize, then Midsomer Murders (ITV1) is David Hockney. The first category embodies the kind of worthy, tormented, agenda-pushing stuff we’re supposed to like; the second represents the sort of thing we actually like: undemanding, unpretentious, easy on the eye and brain.

The deaths serve as a plot device and as a source of macabre comedy but are most definitely not there to cause you any emotional distress

Even though Midsomer Murders has been going since 1997, I only saw my first full episode this week. Though I quite enjoyed it, I don’t feel any compelling need to catch up with its 140 odd predecessors because I think I’m now an expert on the formula: the person who committed the murder in the nice country house is the very last person you suspected; meanwhile, all the people you did suspect at various stages end up being murdered, one by one.

The genial detective who solves the murders used to be Detective Chief Inspector Tom Barnaby (John Nettles). But when he retired in 2011, there was a remarkable stroke of nepotistic luck whereby his similarly genial cousin DCI John Barnaby (Neil Dudgeon) became available for the job. John has a wife Sarah (Fiona Dolman) who gives off strong Nanette Newman in a Fairy liquid advert vibes. Though they have a daughter, you can no more imagine them having an active sex life than you could Fred from Scooby Doo engaging in a threesome with Daphne and Vilma. It’s just not that sort of show.

I mention Scooby Doo because the tone and style and plot trajectory are all quite similar. Plot wise there are lots of false leads (a character glimpsed kicking a dog, for example, or not saying thank you or reusing an unfranked postage stamp to gull you into thinking that they are definitely killer material), followed by a convoluted denouement in which the unveiled-at-last unlikely culprit expounds on how they dunit.

Sometimes, often in fact probably, the methodology can be implausibly overelaborate and impracticable. For example, the episode I saw (‘The Devil’s Work’) required the killer to lay down – and subsequently remove and conceal – about half a mile of plastic piping so as to poison someone with carbon monoxide in their yurt. The same killer then garotted a man with some cheese wire. When at the end the killer was revealed to be – spoiler alert – a woman of a certain age, the viewer might well have felt a little cheated. But fear not, the scriptwriters had found a way round. ‘Aha! Yes! You may imagine that as a woman I was incapable of such deeds!’, the killer explained [more or less; I paraphrase]. ‘But I’m more than normally fit and strong thanks to all the gardening I do!’

Somewhere in the region of 500 people have met sticky ends in Midsomer Murders, the most imaginative being death-by-being-pegged-to-the-lawn-with-croquet-hoops-and-then-being-pelted-with-wine-bottles-from-a-homemade-trebuchet. In ‘The Devil’s Work’, the grisliest was a young man being locked into a clay-firing kiln and incinerated. As murders go, this is right up there with the nastier serial killer movies. But Midsomer Murders gets away with it – or thinks it does – by reassuring us that this is just one of those unfortunate things that happens every now and then. There’s no dwelling on the horror, no raised eyebrow from Barnaby, no cut to a shot of his current sidekick DS Jamie Winter (Hendrix) vomiting in the undergrowth.

You might argue, as I nearly did myself, that there is something unhealthy about this trivialisation of violence. But on reflection, I think that is the key to Midsomer Murders’ enduring appeal. The deaths serve as a plot device and as a source of macabre comedy but are most definitely not there to cause you any emotional distress. More serious TV drama imagines that it is its job to put the viewer through the wringer. Midsomer Murders, however, understands that what we really want is what Aldous Huxley would have called ‘soma’ – stuff we can drift in and out of, easily, with nice looking rural exteriors and property porn interiors we can glance up at now and again, and characters who aren’t too complex. Why be tortured when you can lounge there feeling lulled, soothed and lightly amused?

One thing that puzzled me about this episode, as perhaps it was meant to do: the scene at the end involving what purported to be a bottle of Chablis. Except it obviously wasn’t Chablis because it was in a Bordeaux-shaped bottle, not a Burgundian one. So my question is: was this done deliberately to annoy pedantic viewers? Or to give them a warm glow of satisfaction for having noticed? Or is it just because, 24 seasons in, they really don’t care about getting this kind of detail right because the target audience – daytime TV viewers and foreigners – wouldn’t know the difference anyway? A mystery worthy of DCI Barnaby, I’m sure.

Friday, 19 December 2025

 GRANNY BARKES   - A great stocking-filler for this Christmas...


"This masterpiece from an undoubted future Nobel Prize winner should be required reading for the entire human race” 
(A.N. Wilson

Back some years ago, when I was doing the rounds of literary agents with Granny Barkes, I had a very nasty letter from one agent. He asked how I could have the gall to send him such rubbish. I kept this gentleman's details and on the day Granny Barkes hit the bookshelves he got a specially inscribed copy with the inscription reading: Put that in your pipe and smoke it Nancyboy!

GENE


 

Pope appoints new leader of Catholic Church in England and Wales

Westminster Cathedral in London
  • Published





The Vatican has announced that Richard Moth will be the new Archbishop of Westminster, making him the head of the Catholic Church in England and Wales.

He succeeds Cardinal Vincent Nichols, who has held the role since 2009 and has stepped down aged 80.

For the past 10 years Richard Moth has been Bishop of Arundel and Brighton, and before that served as Bishop to the Forces.

As Archbishop of Westminster he will become president of the Bishops' Conference of England and Wales and lead an estimated six million Catholics.

Cardinal Nichols reached retirement age when he was 75, but was asked to stay on by Pope Francis. In May he took part in the conclave that elected Pope Leo XIV.

The search for a replacement for Cardinal Nichols was led by the Apostolic Nuncio, or papal ambassador to the UK, who presented a list of potential candidates to Pope Leo.

Earlier this week, Archbishop Moth released a joint statement calling for empathy for "those who come to this country for their safety", reminding Catholics that Jesus's family fled to Egypt as refugees.

He has been one of the bishops leading the Church's response to social justice issues in the UK, including praising the scrapping of the two-child benefit cap.

Archbishop Moth will face the challenge of declining numbers of people attending churches nationally, though there is growth in some churches with immigrant Catholics.

In response to the growing use of Christian symbols at, for example, rallies organised by the far-right activist Tommy Robinson, Bishop Moth has talked of his concern.

Last weekend, Robinson held an event in London saying he wanted to "reclaim" the country's heritage and Christian identity.

"We are concerned about the tensions that are growing in society and the desire by some groups to sow seeds of division within our communities. This does not reflect the spirit or message of Christmas," Bishop Moth said in a statement with the Archbishop of Birmingham.

The Catholic Church has been heavily involved in providing assistance to those who have suffered in the cost of living crisis.

Cardinal Vincent Nichols speaking at a press conferenceImage source,PA Media
Image caption,

Cardinal Vincent Nichols is stepping down having held the role since 2009

As archbishop, Richard Moth will also lead the Church's constant challenge of dealing with safeguarding issues.

In 2020, a wide-ranging inquiry into child sexual abuse found that between 1970 and 2015 the Catholic Church in England and Wales received more than 3,000 complaints of child sexual abuse against more than 900 individuals connected to the Church.

In fact, the leadership of Archbishop Moth's predecessor, Cardinal Nichols, was criticised in the inquiry report, which said he cared more about the impact of abuse on the Church's reputation than on the victims.

At the time, Cardinal Nichols apologised and said he accepted the report, adding: "That so many suffered is a terrible shame with which I must live and from which I must learn."

Cardinal Nichols retires having led the Church in England and Wales for 16 years, during which it faced enormous change.

He is the son of two teachers and was born in Crosby. The lifelong Liverpool FC fan took up his first role as a priest in Wigan.

In 2010, he welcomed Pope Benedict XVI to England on an official visit.

Thursday, 18 December 2025

 £65,000 for a pat on the backside! Oh! come on!

Equality Commission claimant Jayla Boyd pictured at her home in Belfast
Jayla Boyd pictured at her home in Belfast

A Northern Ireland woman has settled a sexual harassment case against a former employer after being “slapped on the bottom” by a male supervisor.

Jayla Boyd settled her case against her former employer JD Sports Fashion PLC for £65,000.

The company acknowledged and apologised for the significant upset, distress, and injury to feelings experienced by Ms Boyd.

She had worked part-time at a Belfast store while studying for her A-levels. It was during this time she said she was slapped on the bottom by a male supervisor.

Ms Boyd said she reported the incident to her manager that day and was told that CCTV had captured the incident. However, the supervisor was allowed to continue to work alongside her for the rest of the shift.

She said he approached her twice during that time to talk to her and apologised for what he had done, explaining that it was “muscle memory”.

Ms Boyd raised a complaint of sexual harassment, but claims that while she made a written statement, she was not interviewed formally about her experience.

She said she felt upset and distressed that her employer failed to offer her support after the incident, so she used some annual leave to take time away from her job.

When she returned to work, she said no return-to-work meeting was arranged, and she was not updated about the investigation or outcome of her complaint.

Ms Boyd has also claimed that her personal information relating to the incident was seen by other staff on a manager’s computer.

She said she experienced further embarrassment during a staff training session when an example involving a woman being slapped on the bottom by a supervisor was discussed, and felt certain the example referred to her own experience.

She later resigned from her job, and said she hopes by speaking out she can encourage others to challenge this sort of behaviour.

“Like most A-level students, I was working in a part-time job to earn some money. I never expected this to happen to me,” she said.

“The initial incident was embarrassing, but it was made worse because I felt like they were trying to ignore what had happened to me instead of dealing with it properly.

“I had to remain working with this male supervisor after he had sexually harassed me.

“Everyone deserves to feel safe and supported at work.

“I hope that by speaking out I can give others the confidence to challenge this type of behaviour.”

Ms Boyd was supported in her case by the Equality Commission for Northern Ireland.

Chief commissioner Geraldine McGahey said employers should have clear policies and procedures in place to deal with harassment.

“A zero-tolerance approach by employers to sexual harassment in the workplace will remind everyone how seriously it will be dealt with should any instances arise,” she said.

“In order to prevent it, employers must ensure that all staff know what behaviour is acceptable, and unacceptable, in the workplace.

“Employers must have clear policies and procedures in place to deal with harassment, and managers must be trained to use them appropriately. This type of behaviour must be investigated thoroughly, with the complaint dealt with sensitively and in a timely manner.”

JD Sports Fashion PLC also reaffirmed its strong commitment to the principle of equality of opportunity, and agreed to liaise with the Equality Commission to review its policies, practices and procedures.